Whatever Next - News Flash! JurisFiction Memo Discovered

	Winter 2004

JurisFiction Memo Discovered - Sheds New Light on Missing Agent

A long-forgotten memo from a missing JurisFiction agent was discovered this week. The memo, dated 1986, was found in a leatherbound 1912 copy of Jane Austen's Sense & Sensibility. Tracey Lloyd of Plymouth, England found the memo as it dropped from the book she was unloading from a crate of antique books recently bought at auction. The memo, in near-perfect condition, seems to have been delivered to the incorrect non-Great Library edition. When asked about the unexpected discovery, Lloyd replied, "I don't understand what it's all about. I've asked but no one else knows either. I went to my doctor but he said that I should just keep taking the pills."

JurisFiction Memo discovered by Tracey Lloyd---Jurisfiction Memo

From:Leah Tard PRO No 147#993

To: Jurisfiction Headquarters, Norland Park, Sense & Sensibility

Subject: Unidentified Page Runner

It has come to my attention that there have been spates of destructive Pagerunning inside Children's Literature, namely Little Red Riding Hood. I entered this book only the other day to find that instead of the Woodsman killing the wolf. Little Red Riding Hood does it herself and with a AK47. She also seems to have taken to the drink and possibly cigarettes but I didn't want to get that close.

I hoped that this was an only one off incident but I jumped into other Children's Literature only to find that similar incidents of destructive Pagerunning has occured.

The Wolf from the Three Little Pigs has been informed that the hot water at the bottom of the chimney is there and instead he turns up as a double glazing salesman to get inside the Little Pigs home, I arrived just in time before he managed to gorge himself on Three Little Pork Chops. I will go further to mention that several Fairy Godmothers have been kidnapped and held to ransom in several books leading to choas because the Fairy Godmother doesn't turn up at the appropriate time, put it this way Cinders didn't go to the Ball.

I can hazard a guess as to who the itinerant, a certain Mr Jack-Be-Nimble springs to mind, is but without further assistance I will not be able to catch him.

I would appreciate assitance a.s.a.p. as Mr Nimble is just the sort of character who needs to be shown that such rampant hooliganism will not be tolerated.

Yours Leah Tard

Because of this memo's discovery, new light may be shed upon the disappearance of Agent Leah Tard. It had been previously reported that Agent Tard was apparently boojumed during a routine investigation. Records of exactly what she was investigating are very spotty and several records appear to be missing. Agent Tard worked in the Nursery Rhyme division and had an exemplary record. Her disappearance materially upset several investigations.

Pundits are saying her disappearance may have been something more sinister than just a random boojumming accident and may indicate an inside job. Jack-Be-Nimble, who was mentioned by name in the document, was convicted of eleven gang-land style murders two years after Agent Tard's disappearance. Nimble, of candlestick jumping fame, was also indicated in the arson deaths of six other nursery rhyme characters, mostly C and D Grade generics. He was never convicted of those crimes, but with the surfacing of this document, more charges may be brought against Nimble and his syndicate. JurisFiction authentication of the memo and further investigation will be required. Nimble is currently serving 3 consecutive life terms in a bad Lithuanian translation of Dante's Inferno. Jack-Be-Nimble's Nursery Rhyme role is now being filled by an A-Grade Generic.

The valuable memo will be kept at the JurisFiction Archives for authentication and further study and then will be displayed at the JurisFiction Archives Museum.